The Princess and the Pauper
by waldorbes
Summary: Set after 4x22. Don't read if you don't want spoilers. - Dan was spending his summer in the Hamptons with Eric to try and keep his head off of Blair. So what happens when Blair needs him the most? Will he go or will he keep away? - M just in case.


It had taken months for Dan to figure out just how to give specific contacts certain ring tones on Skype, but once he did figure out how to do so, he had only set one contact with a specific song. So when he passed by his laptop computer, he was shocked to hear an electronic version of Ma Mémoire Sale waft past his ears. A dark brow perked upwards in curiosity, almost finding it hard to believe that Blair would actually reach out to contact him when they hadn't planned on watching a movie at that time. That didn't stop him from answering the call as fast as his fingers would allow him.

The moment their call begun, Blair's face popped onto his screen and his stomach jumped into his throat. He had hoped that any sort of feelings he'd had for Blair would have disappeared with the physical distance between them, as well as the engagement ring on her finger, but it seemed to not dissipate as fast as he would have liked.

His face fell as he truly looked at her face. It was easier to see her now that he had her face fill his screen. She looked frail and a little too pale for his taste.

"Blair? What's wrong?" he asked, as dark brows knitted together in confusion.

"Don't do that with your eyebrows, Humphrey. It looks like a caterpillar attached itself to your face." Dan breathed a small sigh of relief at this, his face falling back into a calm expression. He was happy her sense of humor was still in tact at least.

"Seriously, what's wrong? One of your servants is planning a rebellion already?"

"I'm pregnant."

Dan stopped short at her admission, quickly looking around to make sure that Eric was no where in sight, or within earshot for that matter, before allowing himself to really try and understand what she had just admitted. He roughly swallowed the large lump in the back of his throat and forced a happy expression on his face.

"Th-That's, um, that's great, Blair. What did Serena say when you told her?" he asked, knowing by his image in the corner of his screen, he didn't look as convincingly happy as he hoped he had.

"I can't tell her. Not yet."

"Wait, let me get this straight, you told me before you told Serena? How did I get so lucky?"

Blair visibly groaned in annoyance and all Dan wanted to do was fly to Monaco and be there for his friend. That's all they were right? Friends?

"Blair, what aren't you telling me?" he asked, his voice growing soft and full of concern. A door opened on her end and her expression immediately turned hard when she turned to the intruder.

"What did I say about visitors?" she hollered in her normal Blair-In-Charge voice. She then started to yell several phrases in French that he was sure didn't sound quite nice at all. His head dropped to the top drawer of the desk he was sitting at. Within it sat a French to English dictionary, with a list of commonly used phrases, but he was sure that he wouldn't be able to grab it and look up what she had been saying before she would turn back to him. An exhausted sigh told him that he was right. A dark gaze lifted to meet hers and he could see the hurt in her eyes. He hated to see that look in her eyes. He knew that it never meant anything good.

"The baby isn't Louis' but that doesn't mean I know who the father is," she finally admitted, her voice filled to the brim with shame.

"Who could it possibly be?" he asked, already knowing who one possible father could be, and it made him sick to his stomach.

"The night of the reunion, after Chuck, Nate, and Raina, saved me from Thorpe, Chuck and I went to have a drink at a Bar Mitzvah. And I swear, Humphrey, if you make one comment about me willingly attending a religious event I will find a way to punch you all the way from Monaco."

Dan couldn't help but give a small chuckle at her warning. Knowing Blair, her threat was very real, but he couldn't help it. They had been having such a serious conversation, and then she popped in with that comment. It made him feel as if nothing had changed, and they really were still Dan and Blair.

"Keep going, Blair," he encouraged softly.

"I felt… Happy for the first time in a long time and… And… We had sex." Blair's head fell out of frame, but before it did, Dan could see the clear shame paint her features.

_"Why is Monaco so damn far away?"_ he asked himself inside his head.

"But… If you slept with Chuck, but not with Louis, how do you not know who the father is?" he asked, confusion shown clearly in his face.

"Seriously, Dan?" she asked, her face showing a true anger she felt. He could blame it on the pregnancy hormones but he decided it would be better not to.

"I'm missing something, obviously," he said, his hand rubbing his face forcefully.

"Wow. I guess you were more drunk than me that night. And I was pretty wasted at the time. I mean, I had to have been to have willingly slept with you."

Dan nearly fell out of his seat when her words finally hit.

"Wait, wait, wait. Are you saying I could be the father?" he asked lamely.

"And the Humphrey intelligence fully shines today," Blair said, annoyance and frustration ringing through her tone and expression.

"Are you sure we had sex?" he asked, through his hand. While the idea that he might be tethered to Blair for the rest of their lives lifted his heart for a moment, he also didn't want her to seem so miserable about it. If it were true that Chuck Bass had given she and the Prince their blessing, than that had to mean that Blair was truly happy.

Dan didn't know Chuck's good side very well but he was sure that if he had been willing to let her go, it had to have been for a good reason.

"Do you really think I'd lie about something like that? To you of all people?" His eyes focused on her face. She was upset and clearly hurt. Did it really bother her that much that he thought she'd like to him about something like that? His immediate regret was clear in his expression and the tone he then spoke with.

"No, no, no! Wait! Blair! I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make it sound like I didn't believe you. I just… I don't remember sleeping with you, that's all!"

Blair's face mashed up in annoyance and all he wanted to do was smack himself for sounding so stupid and insensitive. He was definitely not built to be Blair's baby daddy. He'd hardly been able to handle being Georgina's barely even a year earlier. How could he deal with being Blair's if he really was the father of her unborn child?

"I already told you. We had been drinking."

"Was it the night I made you come with me to that pool hall in Brooklyn?" he asked, trying to put together what had happened between them.

"Sadly, yes. And it's also the last time I ever drink cheap alcohol ever again." Dan couldn't help the chuckle that passed over his lips at her comment. Of course Blair had to say something about the bad quality of what they had drank that night. That was the girl he had very nearly fallen in love with.

Wait. Nearly fallen in love with? That's insane! This was Blair Waldorf, the ninety-five pound being of pure girly evil. He could never fall in love with her, or even nearly fall in love with her.

Right?

He couldn't take that risk. He just… He had to keep Blair's friendship. And she wanted to keep his as well, didn't she? It was why she made sure to copy his Netflix queue before she left for Monaco wasn't it?

"Look, I'm sorry for sounding the way I did. I shouldn't have made it seem like you would lie to me about something like that. I know you wouldn't lie to me like that. I don't think you have in the last four years," he admitted, meeting her eyes through the screen.

"I wouldn't even lie about this four years ago. That would have been considered too disgusting to even lie about," she admitted, disgusted. They both laughed then, and he silently thanked whatever was above them that controlled what was going on down on earth that she had found a way to laugh again. He did miss her laugh.

"Thanks, Blair. I can really feel the love."

"Don't get melodramatic, Humphrey."

"Sorry," he replied lightly, the corners of his lips moving upwards along with hers. Things were getting lighter, but he was sure that they wouldn't last that long. Especially when he had to ask his next question.

"Are you sure you're pregnant?" he asked with more hopefulness in his tone than he planned.

"According to the five pregnancy tests I took, yes, I'm sure."

"Five tests?" he asked in disbelief.

_"Is it really that unbelievable that you could be pregnant? I guess it is if you don't want to be pregnant."_

"I had to be sure! Do you know how hard it is to find a pregnancy test in Monaco when you're the Princess of France to be?"

"About as hard as it is to find a Humphrey in Monaco?" he quipped.

"Harder."

Again, they both shared a short-lived laugh. The seriousness of this situation laid too heavily on each of them for the laugh to last for too long.

"What do you want to do?" he asked, almost afraid of what her answer would be.

"I don't know. I'll let you know when I do," she said with a sense of finality. Dan didn't know what that meant until her face disappeared from his screen and the small black box flashed in the corner of his screen telling him that she had signed off.

"Blair, wai—Damn it," he groaned, his head falling into his hands. It felt like last summer all over again. Almost. All Dan wanted to do was go to Monaco and be there for Blair, but he also knew that she'd be furious if he showed up on the castle drawbridge. … If there was even a drawbridge, that is. Then again, with Blair, he was sure that if there wasn't, there was sure to be one very soon.

Dan wasn't one to wallow in his own pity but this time? This summer? He did. He couldn't help it. His frame fell more against the desk as he tried to think of something to do.

"So what are you going to do?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN; Okay, so I pushed Blair's trip to Monaco up a few weeks. There was only one week between the Constance/St. Jude's reunion and her leaving with the prince. Oh yeah, I don't own the characters or anything like that. I needed something to keep my brain occupied during the season hiatus. :D Enjoy the fic!**


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